Fatherhood: A Call to Duty, Learning and Growth

As I reflect on my journey through life, particularly as a father of a toddler as my first child at 55, I’ve come to realize that fatherhood is not just a title, but a profound call to duty. It’s been a journey of learning, growth, and at times, struggle. Every day, I am stretched to be better, and I embrace the responsibility of raising my son as an ongoing lesson. Fatherhood is a call to stretch, but not to stress, for stress is not of God. This journey, with all its challenges, continues to shape who I am, teaching me more than I ever anticipated.

I often say that I was a father to many before I became a father to one. Being a father to many, and serving as a guide to others, prepared me for the responsibilities of fatherhood. But nothing compares to the lessons I’ve learned from Tieri. Fatherhood has taught me that I am both a teacher and a student. My son has been my instructor, challenging me daily to become the best version of myself. Since his birth, I called him my “boss” to highlight that my main job is to meet his needs, identify threats, and ensure his well-being. It’s a leadership role, but one that requires me to live in the future, thinking ahead and preparing for what might come.

But here’s the truth I’ve learned: this journey isn’t about perfection. It’s about doing your best in the circumstances you find yourself in. I strive not for perfection in fatherhood, but rather for my utmost effort. And when I fall short, I rely on faith and prayer, knowing that God will guide me as I guide my son. I look to the Bible for wisdom, as it reminds me that “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6). My parenting effort now will shape his future.

One lesson I’ve learned is that fatherhood requires a shift in perspective. When my son was born, I was eager to prepare for the “perfect” parenting journey. But life had a different plan. A baby changes everything, a timeless truth captured in Faith Hill’s song that has guided my actions every day. It reminds me that if I don’t want disruption, I should not attempt the onerous and sometimes unpredictable responsibility of fatherhood. Parenthood challenges your routine, your priorities, and your goals, but it’s in these challenges that we learn, grow, and strengthen our character.

Take, for example, this past Friday. I had my day already planned out and was settled in my study when my wife called to say that our son was feeling tired and didn’t want to go to daycare. Without hesitation, I told her to let him stay home, and that I would take care of him. This shifted my entire plan for the day. But for me, it wasn’t an inconvenience, it was a responsibility I had already mentally prepared for. So, I rearranged my appointments and tasks to ensure I could stay home with him. Thankfully, I’m able to do this because I work for myself, but I know it might be tougher for a father who needs to call into the office and juggle other obligations.

The most profound lesson I’ve learned, especially as a father in my 50s, is that there’s always something to learn from your child. My son is living in a world I didn’t experience as a child, a world filled with technology, new challenges, and a rapidly evolving environment. This era, defined by volatility yet also marked by incredible opportunities, presents unique challenges that no previous generation has faced. He was born at the tail end of Generation Alpha, growing up in a world that will be shaped by Generation Beta, and will likely transition into adulthood under Generation Gamma. I am only beginning to understand what it means to raise a child in this era. This calls for deep listening, observation, and understanding. I learn more about him, myself, and the world through his eyes, his actions, and his responses.

Parenting in your 50s isn’t easy, especially when you’ve lived a certain way for decades. But the arrival of a child changes everything. And as a father, I’ve had to adapt in my thinking, in my actions, and even how I provide leadership at home. Stability is key, but it’s also important to learn and grow with the changes, recognizing that each phase of my child’s life is a new lesson to be embraced.

This journey is a call to duty. It is challenging, rewarding, and ever evolving. I cannot turn back once this call has been accepted. And as I continue to learn and grow with my son, I know that every day brings a new opportunity to become better, not just as a father, but as a man.

Final Thought:

Fatherhood is not defined by perfection but by effort, faith, and resilience. It is a journey of growth and learning. And no matter where you are in your journey, know that there’s always one more move to make.

Call to Action:

I encourage all parents and fathers to embrace the learning journey of fatherhood, no matter how old you are or what stage you’re at. It’s not about perfection, but about putting in your best effort, growing with your children, and adapting to the changes in their lives. Let’s learn together, support each other, and make a conscious effort to lead our children toward a brighter future.

What lessons has fatherhood taught you? Share your experiences and insights with me, I’d love to learn from your journey too!

Do have an INSPIRED week with the family.